Verbalise your strengths with the 'Dante because' approach

Have you ever come across someone who just can’t put their strengths into words? If they can’t verbalise their own abilities then it could easily hold them back, preventing them building a positive reputation or impressing in interviews.

In my experience it is remarkably common for someone to be able to talk in more depth about their weaknesses than their strengths. Whether this is borne out of self doubt or a fear of looking arrogant, I created the “Dante Because…” approach during one of my coaching courses as a simple tool to overcome this.

Dante’s ‘Divine Comedy’ is a stunning poetic trilogy from way back in the 1400s. It leads the reader on a journey that starts with ‘Inferno’ – his own concept of Hell. A visual architecture creates a world made up of 9 increasingly complex layers that the main character must descend through in order to make it through to Purgatory and eventually enter Paradise. It’s a clever, if uncomfortable, read that rewards you with the beauty of Paradise if you can stick with it through the 9 layers of Hell.

9 layers of Hell. What an opener. Are you still with me?...

So how is this relevant to verbalising our strengths? We often speak on auto-pilot. We have a wealth of material in our brains but we say the first thing that comes into our head. And then we stop thinking of new options. We don’t let our neocortex spend enough time rationalising, so what we say (and even think) can lack conviction. We need to think deeper. We need to descend the layers. Even if that doesn’t feel easy.

Using “Dante Because…” is simple. You ask the individual to complete this sentence:

              “I know I am good at X because…”

For example – “I know I am good at negotiation because I managed to get a 5% discount on our order”

Then, you descend through the layers. You listen to their answer, acknowledge it, then ask them “And what else?” This prompts them to explore an alternate answer, opening up new neural pathways. It may take some time, but be patient and a 2nd ‘Because’ should appear. Then repeat. Ask for a third answer then a fourth, a fifth…. Take them down as many layers as you can until they’re explored all options and exhausted their answers. For example “I know I am good at negotiation because I always get picked to handle these conversations with suppliers”, “because my boss gives me good feedback on my negotiation skills in my annual review”, “Because my costs are lower than my team-mates” With each layer you’ll need to be increasingly patient and allow the silence to hang, often uncomfortably, until you feel sure they’ve explored all their options.

Someone new to this kind of questioning can usually answer 3 layers, but if the individual is used to self-reflection you can often explore 5-7 layers – with super-reflective people being able to do all 9. But don’t push it – trust your gut to tell you when they’ve explored all possible options.

So what’s the result of the Dante Because? Now the individual has an entire toolbox of explanations at their fingertips to express their strengths. They’ve done their thinking time away from the heat of the moment. Then when they’re put on the spot they simply have to recall the information. And the answers are believe-able because they have results. It’s no longer a feeling, it’s a fact. They can believe it, and you can believe it about them.

Everybody has their own strengths. Knowing them is an important step to achievement.