The Leadership Year: Month Ten
We’re in the final quarter of the year, and this can be a time where we feel added pressure to deliver as the approach to Christmas brings deadlines forward and planning for the year ahead starts to build too. But this can also be an apt time to consider our interactions with our team and how effective they are.
This is in many ways a very simple concept. Most of us will be able to identify where we need to invest more in relationships and that will inevitably be through making changes to how we interact with others. But interactions are increasingly complicated, as well as bolstered, by advances in technology.
If we consider some of the earliest interactions humans had, they needed physical in-person presence in order to happen. Through time, we saw the creation of postal services allowing discussions at distance but not in real-time. We take this for granted now, but this would have been a key area of change in our history of communication. You don’t need a history lesson from me to take you through the timeline of phones, fax machines, mobiles, video conferencing and chat functionality. We all live with the results everyday. But it’s a good reminder to us that whereas for generations our choices were quite limited, today we have many options and that can actually be a hindrance.
It’s important that we think about how our interactions are enriching our relationships on a regular basis. It is easy to be lured into a false sense of security that because we are ‘chatting’ regularly with a colleague that our interactions are frequent enough to create a strong relationship. But are these interactions truly enriching? Chat functionality, like the one used in Teams, can be a great tool to create regular interaction but can also often fall into the trap of being purely transactional. And by this I mean, they don’t focus on the relationship but instead are designed to exchange information about task completion and project updates. This might keep a colleague well informed, but not necessarily feeling like they have been invested in.
For many leaders this idea of “transactional versus transformational” communication is one they should return to often. It is easy, in fact it is almost inevitable, that we overly focus on the transactional elements of our relationships as these are necessary to complete our roles. But as leaders in particular, there is a need to invest in the long term growth of individuals and teams. And this means being prepared to have a meaningful rich conversation. Coaching and goal-setting are 2 areas that can help with this, and there are articles on VIA to help with these topics, but it is also worth considering the environment for interactions. How able do people feel to be able to be open with you about their thoughts and feelings? Whether we are interacting face to face or virtually we need to establish a sense of security that enables people to open up.
Good common sense scheduling might be a good place to start here. In the office we wouldn’t be likely to have a serious conversation with someone in the middle of the desks in earshot and expect a truly transformational conversation to have taken place. It is far easier to speak 121 with someone virtually but we do still need to consider some basics. In the office, we can perceive when someone is busy or stressed through body language, and would naturally try and find a window where we could chat to them at a time when they were likely to be more effective. When working apart it is important to share insights into routines and diaries. Trying to have a meaningful chat when someone is about to have an important client meeting or ‘clock-watching’ ready to pick children up from school is not going to be effective. Don’t just improve your interactions like a tick-box exercise. Put yourselves in the shoes of the other person and ensure that you are having meaningful conversations at a time that means something for them.
Another technique that can really improve interactions is keeping a Praise Log. Praise doesn’t just motivate someone to get their job done, it creates personal connection and ensures that they feel seen. In a virtual space this is even more important. Simply acknowledging good work 121 is an easy way to start. Keep it authentic – reasons to praise should be clear and delivered with conviction. People see through fake praise really quickly so don’t use a praise log as a tally exercise. Instead use it to prompt praise that should have happened already. But what about public praise? As leaders we often have a stronger profile and reputation than the people in our teams. We can ensure they have the opportunity to shine through praising them in front of others. People are often reluctant to shout about their own work, but feel a little warm glow when others do it for them! It’s important to still be authentic. Be clear why you are praising this person and it can encourage others to role model the behaviour also. But the praise log can help you keep biases in check. Often teams have a perception of someone being “the favourite” and this doesn’t mean equal praise is the answer, but it does mean ensuring praise is equal to someone’s efforts and acknowledging that sometimes people’s work can go under the radar and addressing that.
Creating opportunities to praise can also emerge from looking at their work without invitation. This can make people feel nervous as it can feel like a snoop. But if a leader is looking at work with the intent to amplify the good qualities this can be powerful. Imagine if your line manager surprised you with praise on a project – that can be a great interaction. The behavioural scientists Heapy and Losada found a direct link between teams who received positive comments on work completed and high performance. Naturally you might also find things you don’t like. If they’re vital – of course you must tackle them, but to encourage strong relationships that lead to meaningful work improvements try to ensure your positive comments always out-number your negatives. Heapy and Losada suggest 6:5 as a minimum ratio to aspire to.
By considering interactions more consciously we can start to make changes. In the space of a month you can create a praise log, and start to think about how often your transformational interactions happen and whether they have the impact you intended. This foundation can start to create bespoke plans for how to better improve your interactions in the longer term.
